Letting go...things have weight.

Many of you know that I just moved out of my home recently. The home where my son, Elias was born and my marriage started and ended.

What I did not realize, until I started packing was just how much of my energy was tied up in that house! My intention with the move was letting go of the old and welcoming in the new. Many insights came to me throughout the moving process. My main realization was just how much WEIGHT material things hold, energetically as well as physically. So many Memories are attached to things and we are terrified of change, letting them go. Hopes, dreams and many expectations are also tied into material things, especially houses. This is where we start our family, create our memories and we expect houses to be our safe haven. I see how we start to identify ourselves with our things.

So I have found that the physical process of letting go of my things is so very powerful, way more powerful energetically than I ever could have imagined. I literally sold and gave away almost everything I own. Goes to show, you really cannot have a deep knowing and understanding of something until you actually experience it. I cried, I laughed (reading out journal entries before I let them go) I felt every emotion humanly possible. Memories flowed through my mind, Elias taking his first steps, running down the hallway....

It's amazing how giving things away is both freeing (letting go) and terrifying! Especially since my next step is a step into the unknown, a leap of faith for the most part. I know that I want to be of service by sharing this process with others on a larger scale as I continue to learn, grow and open my heart in the process. I also have a "plan" as well to make this physically possible and will be sharing that information soon as it continues to unfold.

Now that I have embraced my gifts and understand what I am here to do, I know that all else will fall into place. These past three years have mainly been about learning to TRUST my inner voice and the messages from spirit (God, universal energy, however each person identifies this greater power, which I ultimately believe is not separate from us).

Trusting means letting go of control, of attachment, of fear and learning to go with the flow. Most of my friends already thought that I was a free spirit before opening up to this process. Hell, I thought I was too, we are so conditioned that we fool ourselves as well! It just goes to show that what others see on the outside, is not an accurate refection of what each person is experiencing within. Everything we see with others is so surface, people are taught to wear a mask, wanting to give of the perception that they are happy and in control of their lives. How backwards we are in what we have been taught, that vulnerability and true openness is a sign of weakness. If only we could truly open ourselves up to others, we could support each other in growing, healing and feeling at one with each others experiences. That is true self empowerment. As we let go and open up, we make room for the new, for love without judgement. We would really see how alike we all are in our human experiences and not try to be something we are not, striving for this illusory model of perfection, judging and condemning ourselves and others. 

I feel sure of myself and of the direction that my life is taking, more now than I ever could have imagined before. How is that possible when things are changing so rapidly, shaky, my world as I knew it is breaking apart before my eyes? However I can honestly say, that I feel more safe, less nervous and more trusting than I ever have in my life. I am not alone and my life I KNOW this on a deep level, a knowing that comes not from sheer faith but from experiencing the miracles that can happen as I continue to embrace the process of letting go. 

I am so excited to continue to share my process with others, so they too can let go of the fear and trust, in order to awaken to their own gifts. The gift of looking within and breaking free from the self created security cocoon is essential to releasing the blockages that keep us from moving forward. I am not saying you have to give up all your material things! That is just one of the freeing things I chose to do when going through this process (I have also been processing for a few years now). Suddenly change does not seem so scary anymore once we break free and start our transformation to butterfly ;).

I am in a complete state of flux right now, an in between moment. Letting go of the past, embracing the now and excited about the future. I feel every emotion humanly possible and I trust that all is unfolding perfectly.

Thank you to all who continue to support me in this process, as I give my all to support others in doing the same.